Culture & Identity

When asked to make art about my cultural and identity I drew a blank. It seemed like such a broad topic -- what aspect of my culture or myself should I include? I began with supplies that were very familiar to me and began to draw an image that was familiar, a face. After all, it is about me. From that emerged a picture about the duality of my culture and identity. My "family tree" grows from my face and spreads across two countries. I am American. I was born and raised in the US. But I am also Cuban. I was raised by a Cuban family, with Cuban customs and traditions. I spoke Spanish as a first language and I celebrate Noche Buena instead of Christmas Eve. But, I wasn't born there. My family came to this country in 1969. My mom was a child when she left Cuba but she was raised in a city, albeit in the US, that allowed her parents to own a small business and not speak english. So to some I am not quite Cuban, to others I am not quite American. So what am I?

At times I feel equally stretched at both sides. My family says I'm Cuban but I am Americanized. I went away to college, when many of my friends stayed home at their mothers' request. But at the same time, going away was the first time I felt that I was any different than everyone else around me. The first time that checking the box stating that I am a minority made sense. In a way it made me feel special, I got to explain the food and traditions, my friends back home understood whether they were Cuban or not. The problem is I don't look like what some would call stereotypically hispanic and that works against me in trying to defend my culture. I look White, so I must be. People forget I speak Spanish or that my upbringing was any different than theirs. Growing up in Miami it was assumed. If I was not Cuban, then I was at least Latina, people spoke to me in Spanish because they assumed I would answer. So even if I was seen as an Americanized version, that part of me was always seen, I was just like everyone else. Outside of Miami, I have to keep reminding people, I feel like I mention my culture and traditions more than I ever did growing up and I find myself feeling like a spokesperson.

I feel this sense of duality stretches across all areas of my identity, not just my culture. As we filled out the sheet about target/non-target groups and took the steps forward or backward I found myself going back and forth. Growing up I was never without anything I needed but we never had much extra and I was always aware that money was an issue. I grew up with a single parent, who was not college educated, both steps back, but both are parts that taught me a lot and made me who I am today. With the help of my extended family, we never had to live in a bad neighborhood. My mom always had a flexible job that allowed her to pick me up from school, and I always went to good schools. I didn't go to private school but I went to magnet art public schools. But to say that everything was perfect undermines my mother's struggle and to say that things were tough does the same. It was neither. Although I fall into several target categories, I was actually quite privileged. Culture and identity don't fit neatly into little boxes. There is a history behind each answer, and I feel that often the history is what makes us who we are rather than the answers themselves. The problem is that the boxes cause stereotypes about privilege that often people don't look beyond.